The X games

I realize that I've been blog deficient since Thanksgiving time. I have a valid excuse. I've been beyond busy playing the "X GAMES". X as in eXcrement! I'm up to my eyebrows and last nerve potty training a very defiant 3 year old boy and a puppy that seemingly has an unnatural fear of defecating in nature, and will hold it for an unbelievable amount of time just so she can relieve herself on the floor indoors. I am losing my good sense of humor along with my sense of smell. The continued exposure to the foul smells has possibly damaged my olfactory system for life. If I can't enjoy the smell of such things as lilacs, leather, fresh coffee, and my husbands neck again due to forced participation in the eXcrement games, someone is GONNA OWE ME BIG TIME. I suppose I could make Andy sign a contract saying that he promises to care for me in my old age in payment of subjecting me to horrendous potty training. But how do I make Cuppie settle her debt??? It's not like there are sweat shops hiring mixed breed dogs to make low cost blue jeans, or to stitch synthetic wigs. She's cute, but far too belligerent to be a doggie model. At the rate she is growing, its safe to assume we will be able to work out a good barter. My hundreds of clean ups on project poo for several years of "home security" service. Still even if she protects me from the harm of home invaders and he treats me like a queen in my old age, a more immediate reward would sure help my performance and my attitude... I might even win a gold medal! :) I'm outfitted for success with a carpet shampooer, disinfectant, SHOUT laundry pre-treater, and a diminished sense of smell.